So, I had my high school reunion about a week and a half ago, and while a part of me wants to say it was great seeing the old gang, another part of me wants to say it wasn't. I unfortunately didn't get to see the people I really wanted to because they weren't there and I had a plan for the evening that due to the way things went, I couldn't execute. I thought I was going to leave an impression on people, show them that there was more to me than what they saw in high school, but that didn't happen. To some extent, it felt like being back at high school all over again.
Which reminds me, I know I've commented before that I thought I was an ISTJ in the past, but by reliving my past for a single night, I think I now have evidence to prove that I was an INTJ earlier in my life than I thought which has prompted me to write a guide on how to spot an INTJ at school. And this should work for any age INTJ, hopefully. However, fair warning, I don't think this particular piece is written all that well.
1. The Silent Revolutionary
INTJs aren't exactly known for their rebellious attitudes, but they are known for acting unilaterally when it suits them or if a rule seems superfluous. If your school has a lot of rules and loves to enforce them, look through those rules and see if you can spot any that just seem to go a little too far. For instance, when I attended my second high school, Bishop Foley, it was a private school and the dress code was really picky and stringent in some ways, and really lax in others. That said, we had to have our sleeves rolled down. I actually wasn't keen on Foley at the time, so every day for two years, I had my sleeves rolled up a little. Yes, it was small and likely went unnoticed by many, but it was a rule I broke. And it wasn't the typical dress code rule you see broken, like not having your shirt tucked in or having a weird haircut. That's something to keep in mind when you look for the silent revolutionary: seek out the one who breaks a rule that others don't, or who breaks it in a way that many would not have thought of.
2. Going Against the Grain
What's popular in the school you're looking at? Is there a movement, song, music genre, or a type of "energy" that is taking the student body by storm? Well, if you want to pick out the INTJ, just look for the one kid who is wholly unaffected by the (new) sensation. Or, say there's an opportunity for the kids at school to ditch their uniforms for some other outfit that isn't daily wear.
Example: at Foley, there were times when we were allowed to ditch the uniform, but we had to follow specific rules on what we could wear in order to ditch it. One time, we were allowed to come to school in Detroit Tigers swag, and another we could come to school in costume for Halloween. Well, being an INTJ, I have no interest in team sports and the uniform wasn't so unbearable that I would rather go to school dressed like a buffoon, so both days I wore my uniform. Course though, on Halloween a girl made fun of me for doing so, and I made fun of her right back for dressing up. So, if you want to pin point that INTJ, just look at that one kid who isn't following the crowd.
3. Value Hard Work Even When Worthless
It isn't uncommon for busy work to sometimes be assigned at school. It's extremely unfortunate especially if people are paying for their children to attend the school, so once in a while, a teacher will run into a student or two who are able to pick up on the latest "scam." I had a friend O'Meara who just copied the answers to the busy work-style homework from another classmate every day. But one day, that other classmate just went ahead and did the homework for him, using her other hand to write with so it looked sloppy (like O'Meara's). The teacher looked at the homework assignment, paused, shook her head, but then proceeded to check it off anyway.
Now, this is something you'll never see an INTJ do. Regardless of how small or pointless the assignment, we're likely to put all of our beings into it even if we know it's busy work. Why? Because it's part of our code. We have a sense of justice and are slaves to it, especially where effort and duty are concerned. Plus, we wouldn't want to take the risk on getting busted for copying or cheating. And, if the other person should get something wrong, it would ruffle our jimmies to also get it wrong just because we were cheating. I can remember doing many homework assignments to the nth degree because I thought there was something in it for me and not letting any one cheat off me. I still take academic honesty very seriously these days.
4. Aversion to Group Projects
INTJs are extremely individualistic and hate relying on others for anything. Even if a project is labor intensive and takes at least four people to complete, an INTJ would rather fulfill the duties of all four people than depend on the others to do their jobs right. I can remember some of my teachers telling us to partner up, and everyone else in the class being like "Yeah!" while I was groaning. Partially because I hated doing it and partially because I could never get the partner I wanted. (More on this in point 5.)
There was one class I had, Marriage and Parenting, where partnering up happened often. Toward the end of the semester, I didn't bother to partner up one day, either because there weren't enough people or my teacher made the concession that we didn't need to, so I didn't. I worked alone and it was bliss. After that one time, I continued to work alone and my teacher never said anything to me, so I secured the course and I thought to myself, "Damn! I should've tried this earlier." Group and partner projects are rubbish.
5. Lone Wolf
INTJs may have friends, and it is possible that they could learn to appreciate some of the people in their class--I know I did--but even after learning that appreciation and even after having my own circle of friends, I was still a huge loner. It wasn't uncommon for me to get "cut out" by my "friends" or even by people who I thought had accepted me into their group. I was once cut out of the fake band I had helped to form just because I didn't seem to fit the mold. So, once in a while, I was alone. Hell, even to today. I often don't hear about things that happen to my friends until six months after the fact.
A better example of my lone wolfishness is this: one time I was having a conversation with my friend Babecki over Instant Messenger and I had had some concerns over who he was hanging out with, not because I thought they were bad influences on him but because I was concerned how many friends he had, or something weird like that. Why was it my business? I don't remember, I may have been concerned about the integrity of our little group and I didn't want "untouchables" having access to it. So, he explained to me how he has many circles of friends and that not all of them were as close to him as others were. For whatever reason, this blew me away. I had no idea you could be at different levels of friends with people or have different circles. Course though, considering the only friends I ever had came from school at that time, it wasn't surprising for me to think like that.
|Basically me. Either back then or now.|
Until they get to college, students for the most part seem very worldly or caught up in the moment. They tend to live in and for the moment. They're very real, in a sense. INTJs don't have this quality; they're otherworldly. What's going on in the mundane world around them doesn't interest them, so they tend to have the personality of a ghost or a mystic. They're not very lively, and they always seem bored or annoyed that they're forced to live through such a mundane experience or alongside mere mortals. Their minds are elsewhere and the concepts going through their minds aren't the sort of things you'd usually find in a teenager's head. They're disconnected from their peers, and they almost carry themselves like one of the teachers. I know, because I had people, students and teachers alike, who thought I was on a different level in many ways. Someone even wrote so in my yearbook. So, another way to find the INTJ is to look out for that kid who "looks" like he's somewhere else despite his very stimulating surroundings.
Alright, you guys. That's all I have for this week. I know it wasn't much, and I know it isn't like me to make such a mundane post, but this was something that was on my mind and floating around my head since my reunion. I truly do think now I was an INTJ in high school. It would explain some things and feelings I had forgotten. Anyway, don't feel too dissatisfied with this post as I plan on writing more INTJ posts per week from now on. My INTJ posts are usually very popular so I'm going to try to capitalize on them in terms of views, ads, and helping me to write my book The INTJ Mystique. So, that's it for this week.
Keep writing, my friends.
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