Flash Stories & Poetry Day 21: Reflection "High School Reunion"

Hey, everyone.

So, last night was my high school reunion. It was... interesting, to say the least, for good and disappointing reasons alike. So today, I'm going to write a reflection on how it went and what happened. Unfortunately, I fear I may paint a bad picture of it. I left two hours after it was supposed to end, most of us did because nobody told us to GTFO, but to be honest, three hours is far too short for a high school reunion, so I got home sometime after one, and didn't get to bed till three. Then I had to get up this morning at 9:30 for church, so I'm sleep deprived, and when I get like this, I get very melancholy. But to be honest, again, I think I may just be an angsty teenager at heart. Anyway...

Today's topic is... Reflection.

Thirty minutes on the clock: 30:00. And... go.

At first, I wasn't going to write about my reunion because I was afraid of writing something that was incorrect. I wanted to process last night a little bit more, but the best method for me to process something is to write about it, allora (Italian for "so"), I must process it by processing it. So, first question: did I learn the lesson that I feel like I'm missing from ten years ago? Maybe, it's hard to say. I did learn a lesson from last night and that is that a high school reunion isn't high school, which is a weird thing to say because it's so obvious, but when you haven't seen certain people in a decade, you don't expect them to have changed. Time moves for you, but not for them. So when people look different, sound different, act different, or talk about things like being married and having children, it's a very strange phenomenon. You just don't expect any one to ever actually change. Some people don't. There was a guy or two who looked and sounded just like they did back in HS, but most people were different in some way or another.

Another thing that "got" to me was that I thought I had a handle on what certain people were like, and either I clearly didn't, or they get a couple of beers in them and they just act like a bunch of rowdy college students, which is possible, but most of us have graduated already. That time in our lives is over. So, it was super weird for me to see people I thought I knew act in a way contrary to my "knowledge", but it was also unusual because it wasn't that dissimilar from a Laesch family party--there was something oddly familiar about it. It felt at home, but not quite.

So, besides being disoriented and learning that time has passed for everyone else, was there anything good that happened to me? Well, I explained to like four or five different people that I was writing now. They all seemed pretty impressed, but I don't know if I made any sales. My Old Man told me that people at a 10 year reunion are most likely going to want to brag about all the great things they've done. That wasn't my experience. Rarely ever did I get the other side of the conversation and find out what the person opposite me is doing now because conversations would be disrupted and my piece was just so damn long. So, I felt like I did a lot of talking, but didn't get to find out anything other than a lot of people live in and around Ann Arbor. Apparently, that place is jumping. But, there was one thing about the evening that was wholly unexpected.

For starters, I had two guests; we were allowed to bring a "guest" which was either actually a guest or a date. My two were actually friends from the year behind us, and I thought I was going to be the only one who did that; I wasn't. Someone from my class actually married a girl from the year behind us and brought her with him. For a long time, I didn't recognize her. I just thought she was loud, drunk, and obnoxious. Eventually I recognized her and I had a whole new impression of who she was... as loud, drunk, and obnoxious. But, not quite.

See, I started playing that bean bag version of horse shoes with my two guests and I played both teams. Later, the one girl joined in, and it was fun. But then, while we're playing, she starts talking to me about what she did in college, how she went from Vet Tech to hospitality, which is a weird change. But, she talked to me at such length about it that I couldn't help but think, "Has she forgotten about the game?" The other thing I thought was that she wasn't nearly as loud, drunk, and as obnoxious as I thought. She could be quite normal when she wanted to, and I was very surprised at how easily she just carried a conversation with me, much more so than some of my classmates. Perhaps it was the booze.

Anyway, at the end of the night as I'm leaving with my guests, she was our last stop for goodbyes, and she gave all three of us a hug; it surprised me because why would you give someone you barely knew a hug? None of my former classmates gave me a hug, but alright, we can do that. And since I don't believe in giving wimpy hugs, I squeezed her as I am wont to do--I accidentally spilled her wine. But she was completely fine with it saying that she liked the "tightness." She probably meant that she liked be hugged so tightly; she was a little spiffed. So she put her wine down, and came back for a second hug, and she let me have it, so I likewise had to give her the beans. It was definitely one of the best hugs I've had in a while. And as we parted, I told her she was the surprise of the night, which she thought was very sweet, although I didn't specify whether or not the surprise was pleasant. I mean, it was and it wasn't. It was more so pleasing than not.

Unfortunately, I didn't get any of the things done I had planned for the evening. I wanted to ask for a new alumni card, completely forgot. There was someone I wanted to apologize to, Amanda S. (from her maiden name), she wasn't there, so Amanda if you ever read this, I'm sorry for being a douche in high school. And the one person I wanted to see wasn't there, so that was a major bummer. Lastly, I wanted to have fun; did I? I don't know. It doesn't feel like I did, but the party was definitely off the hook and I felt like it was worth it. However, after months of staying home on Saturday night, watching Ghost Adventures, I was pretty desperate to do anything else with my Saturday night. I also don't feel like I made the impression I was hoping to make, that it got lost or ignored or never had the opportunity to come out, but with my sort of reserved energy, the kind where you can only get to know it one-on-one, it gets lost among all the people and booze and partying. Which means that if I ever hope to make the impression I want to, I'm going to need a venue that favors my energy. Oh, wait a minute; you're looking at it! There's nothing for it, then; I'm just going to have to keep writing.

I'm still left with a lingering thought or meditation, and that is the "implied importance of high school." We're told high school is a big deal in our culture, we have hundreds of movies that center around it, and we even feel the need to memorialize our experience by having reunions every so many years. My question is, is high school actually that important to us, or do we just think it is because we're told that, hence becoming a self-fulfilling prophecy? It's hard to say for a lot of reasons, but for one unexpected reason for me and my classmates is that it's because our class was so small, 110 or less. So, we all knew each other more or less. We all knew about the great things we had done, the great things we wanted to do, and the great things we hoped to achieve, and amongst that aura of potential is an unhinged, immature spirit of invincibility and inevitable victory--our collective will manifested as an unstoppable force and immovable object. Did we fall victim to the implied importance of high school and fail at the climax of life, or did we meet it and not only succeed, but exceed, the climax?

That question is going to drive me nuts for years, not because I don't have an answer, but because I want to do my part in making sure I fulfill my end of it.

***

 

Alright, that's enough. I would say stop the clock, but I paused my timer at some point and I didn't hit resume, so it's possible I wrote over time or I'm stopping in time. And then I went back and added some stuff.

 



I'm going to try distancing myself from the high school theme for a while. I mean, I did get some good intel regarding a few projects I have in the works, but that intel is for my books, not my blog. So, I think this week's theme will be the importance of writing earnestly. Seeing everybody at the reunion and telling them what I was up to, it's kind of like, oh sh*t, now I have to deliver on the writing goods. They'll be expecting it. It's time to get some stuff done. Plus, it's just where I belong.

Keep writing, my friends.

More About Bryan C. Laesch:

My Works:

Amazon: My Author Page, My Influencer Page
Facebook: Bryan C. Laesch, Bawdy Scholar
Patreon: Bryan C. Laesch
Twitter: BryanofallTrade
Youtube: Bryan C. Laesch, Bawdy Scholar 

Flash Stories & Poetry Day 18: Reflection "Lesson to Learn"

Hey, everyone, and Happy Thanksgiving.

Now, for today's writing exercise, I'm going to be doing something a bit different. Typically I spin the wheel and write as whatever genre I've been given, but since today is a non-fiction day, I'm actually going to do a reflection. On what? Well, my high school days, yet again. I really hope I don't sound like a broken record, but again, they do say your high school years are some of the most formative in your life and I do feel like something larger happened to me than the average high schooler, but there's a point beyond that. So, let's get started, and since I do tend to wax philosophic occasionally, I'll still be timing myself so I can stay on task.

So, today's topic is... Reflection "Lesson to Learn."

Thirty minutes on the clock: 30:00. And... go.

Now, like I said, some say your high school days are some of the most formative of your life, and I feel like mine were no exception. See, I attended Notre Dame High School in Harper Woods, and I loved it there. Sure, there were one or two people I had problems with, but for the most part, I relished my time at ND. I never used to like school until I went to ND. I wouldn't say it felt like home, but it did feel right and good in a way I can't explain.

Now, in March of my Sophomore year, right in the middle of our spirit week which we called Irish Week and celebrated during the week of St. Patrick's Day, a news story broke that wasn't supposed to yet where Cardinal Maida, the archbishop of Detroit at the time, would be closing 15 Catholic schools throughout the Archdiocese of Detroit due to money problems, and the schools that were closed included grade schools and high schools alike.

When my mother told me the news in the morning, I refused to believe it. But when I got to school that day, it was the only thing on everybody's lips. Nobody knew anything except for rumors, but at about 8:00 when our first class was supposed to start, Mr. Kuhn, one of our advisors, walked the halls and told everyone to gather in the gym. We were supposed to have some sort of spirit week activity in there, I don't remember what it was, but we were separated by class. Fr. Sadjak, who was principal the year before and my Latin teacher for the two years I was there, led us off in prayer where the emotions of the situation did overwhelm some of us. Course though, no one actually broke down because we were an all guys school. But the next few hours descended into a spirit week activity/bonding session as we all pledged to do what we could to prevent the school from closing. It was extremely heart-warming. Unfortunately, as can be guessed, we failed and were forced to disperse.

Angry at the world and wanting some form of retribution for what we lost, we took our anger out on others leading to a not-so-positive reputation at the school that most of us would go on to attend, Bishop Foley Catholic High School in Madison Heights. One teacher, upon finding out that a student she didn't know at the time was from ND was from ND, asked him, "Are you bitter, too?" Course when we all heard that, we wanted to slap the sh*t out of her. But, it was true; we were bitter. Some of us did assimilate into Foley, but most of us were loathed the experience. By Senior year, we had settled down, but Foley never met our expectations and was always worse than ND in practically every way. Attending Foley at the time felt like insult to injury. The world had curb stomped us, and then kicked us in the nuts while we lay in the gutter.

But as I look back, I can now see that things weren't that bad, and I do greatly regret my actions at the time. Foley welcomed us with open arms; some of the administration was pretentious as hell, but the student body and a good number of the teachers were fantastic and understanding. Looking at my year book, a number of people mentioning that they were glad I chose Foley after ND closed. What's funny about that is that I didn't choose Foley, my parents did. But as my Senior year was coming to a close, even then I began to regret who I was and what I had done. It was at that time that I could feel a change, and part of me didn't want to leave.

In the animated web series RWBY, a character loses the lower half of her arm in battle. A prosthetic arm is supplied to her, but she doesn't try it on. Everyone wants to see her return to "normal," but as she says, having lost her arm, that was her new "normal." At which point, her father says "Normal is what you make of it." He goes on to explain that just because something terrible has happened to you, that doesn't have to stop you from being who you want to become. It would've been great to have that piece of advice back then, but as a headstrong kid in my teens, all I wanted was revenge or to just surrender to life. I wanted Notre Dame back, and I would've done anything, no matter how impossible, to get it back. But, I never would, so I grieved.

Ten years after the fact, I am left with a pile of regret, but my reunion offers me a chance to set things right. That's one of the reasons why I'm going. Some people I do need to apologize to, and others I just have to show them that I'm not just a hardass and that I would take something valuable away from my experience there. But there's something else.

As you can tell, losing ND and going to Foley has had a great effect on me. I can't shut up about it and I can't stop thinking about it. I can't rest on it. Why? Is it just because I'm an INTJ and we think everything to death? Possibly. But, I have a feeling that the experience was meant to teach my something. I was supposed to learn something or do something, and I didn't and that bothers me. The whole experience was far too significant to just have been a random occurrence. What is it that I'm missing? I don't know, but I feel like I'll have a chance to accomplish whatever my task is at the reunion. Sure, I do get the feeling that it would've been easier ten years ago, but I think there's still a chance. That's another reason why I'm going.

Some of the people from Foley have been on my mind lately; one of them has been up there for longer than I care to admit. The psychics say there could be a connection between me and them, or that something important happened to them in their lives, but regardless, I want to know. I want to be enlightened. What is it about them that I can't forget them, that makes me miss them when I barely knew them, and that makes me want to see them so badly? I have a task to complete. I just have to make sure I don't fall back into my old habits when I get there and start acting the wallflower.

***

 

Alright. Can't say stop the clock as I did go over time. Not a lot though, maybe just a minute.

Anyway, I've got stuff to do during this holiday. Wish me luck at my reunion and pray that I find the answers I'm looking for or that I can finally find peace on this matter.

Keep writing, my friends.

More About Bryan C. Laesch:
Amazon: My Author Page, My Influencer Page
Facebook: Bryan C. Laesch, Bawdy Scholar
Patreon: Bryan C. Laesch
Twitter: BryanofallTrade
Youtube: Bryan C. Laesch, Bawdy Scholar

Flash Stories & Poetry Day 17: Shakespearean Sonnet "Humors"

Hey, everyone.

So, today's Thanksgiving Eve and marks three days until my HS reunion, so as you can imagine, I have a hard time focusing and I have bunch of stuff to do, but because today is also a work out day and I've been pushing myself past 11 on a scale that only goes up to 10, it's better I get today's writing exercise out of way ASAP. Let's crack on.

Wheel of Genres, turn, turn, turn! Tell me the genre I will discern!





Today's topic is... Sonnet! Oh, boy! A sonnet. Now, I'm a student of Shakespeare and I was an English major so I've studied Petrarch (which is hilarious because he's Italian), but as you can imagine, I know all about the sonnet. I wrote my first one when I was Sophomore in HS, and I've written few others since due to the fact that I want to honor my main man Shakespeare every time I write one, hence I don't write many because of the effort and skill involved.

Now, there is a new movement these days in sonnet writing where the focus is to just write something fourteen lines long and there's no requirement on line length. I once took an avant-garde poetry class (by mistake!) and saw some really strange (and terrible!) sonnets. So, what am I going to do here? Do I take the lazy, modern way out, or do I try to do homage to my Mentore (Italian for "mentor")? Well, Shakespeare did once write a play in two weeks (The Merry Wives of Windsor), so the least I can do for the Bard is attempt to write a sonnet in a half hour.

Thirty minutes on the clock: 30:00. And... go!

Let me not deny what my heart desires
And be a betrayer to my passions.
Within my bosom, there burns awesome fires,
To chart a course of daring, new actions.

Regarding me, I am not just my past,
No, I also possess a future bright;
I shall write enduring works that shall last
And not go silently into the night.

But what of those humors that led me here?
They too are susceptible to great change.
Think me not mystic to search a new tier
To make comrades with those I did estrange.

--For in my past there is much to regret,
--A brighter future, I hope to beget.

***

 

Stop the clock! I have a little more than eight minutes left. Booyah! Did you see that, Mentore?! Now, I just need to write a five act play in two weeks seeing as how I've already written a five act, Shakespearean play. I will admit that I did steal my opening from Shakespeare though, and my couplet isn't quite a twist like you're supposed to have in Shakespearean sonnet, but it does refer back to the beginning. And before you ask, yes, I did have my high school reunion on my mind. Hopefully I don't sound like a broken record.

But anyway, that's it for today. I hope you enjoyed it. If you want to use the wheel I made, you should be able to access it here. And if you have the time, please check out my books for sale on Amazon which you can find through my author page. The link is below. Also, I reworked my Patreon page, so why not give it a look and consider becoming my patron. I would appreciate it.

Keep writing, my friends.

More About Bryan C. Laesch:

My Works:

Amazon: My Author Page, My Influencer Page
Facebook: Bryan C. Laesch, Bawdy Scholar
Patreon: Bryan C. Laesch
Twitter: BryanofallTrade
Youtube: Bryan C. Laesch, Bawdy Scholar