Honestly, I don't remember what I promised to write for this week's INTJ article, but I think I said I'd be doing...
If you'd like to read the original, you can find it here. But to be honest, some of these were really hard to come up with. I was really scraping the bottom of the barrel for ways I buck the INTJ stereotype, but I did manage to come up with ten altogether. However, I decided to save five of the least ways I buck the stereotype for the last one of these I'm going to write. So, let's take a look at these.
1. I Understand Social Interactions
The INTJ stereotype says we're all socially awkward as f*ck and don't know how to act in front of people. For me, this isn't true. While people may feel awkward in my presence or around me, that doesn't me I do. In fact, I don't allow awkward silences to occur in my life anymore, or rather I don't allow a silence to make me feel awkward. But, going back to social interactions, events, or functions, I totally understand how to act in them appropriately. This comes from the fact that my parents, while not socialites by any stretch of the imagination, were well bred and know well the formalities of social events and passed on their knowledge to me. Plus, in watching how others interact and being able to read people fairly well, my knowledge and intuition was further extended.
Having said all that, however, this does not mean that I am the smoothest mother f*cker in the room. It all depends on my mood at the time. If I'm tired, run down, disappointed, or feeling unhappy in any way, I won't care what's expected of me. And, there have been times when I've bucked the social conventions of the day to critical acclaim--some of my antics bring forth honest chuckles because of their direct commentary on the situation. So when I'm not feeling it, not only do I not care, but people also encourage me.
2. I Love Hugs
Another part of the stereotype is that INTJs really like their personal space and hate being touched. I can relate especially since I'm a germaphobe and OCD, but I do enjoy hugs. In fact, I take them quite seriously. I've observed them and have examined the best ways to give them and how they should feel. I have even come up with a system for the giving what I call the World's Perfect Hug. However, there is a caveat to this: I only hug attractive women meaning should I join the Free Hugs Campaign, only hotties can hug me. I don't hug dudes and I don't give hope to the hopeless. So, I'm not going around hugging people like an ENFP, but if one of my female friends wants a hug, I'm going to give it to her and I will do so willingly. Now, there are some hugs you can't escape like from family or members in your church who only wish you the best, but for everyone else, there is a standard. If you don't meet it, I'm sorry. But if you do, prepare to meet the world's best hugger.
3. I Don't Play Devil's Advocate
INTJs challenge things; often the older, traditional systems and ways of thinking. Hell, they challenge other people's thinking. There's an image on Pinterest that says something to the effect of "If you hang out with me long enough, I just might convince you to think for yourself." And so, because of this reputation as well as the fact that INTJs are outsiders and sometimes find it amusing to experiment with certain taboos, we have a reputation for debating everything and anything, even if we belong to the opposing side. For me, this is certainly not true. I hate debate because when I come against stern confrontation, I get flustered, angry, and jittery, and I end up forgetting some of my points or the reasons why I believe or think something. And there are some things out there that I find so repulsive, i.e. abortion, porn, drug use, communism, etc, that I won't even mock debate them. I mean, I can, and I would probably win, but I won't.
4. I Don't Hate Talking on the Phone
INTJs keep to themselves. And due to the stereotype that we're socially awkward, we've also somehow developed the stereotype for not answering the phone when people call. And, it's believed that we prefer texting. Again, for me this isn't true. In fact, let me tell you a story: A few years ago when I was still at Wayne State, I needed to see a counselor and I remember thinking, "Why should I schedule an appointment to see a counselor on the computer when I'm going to be on campus tomorrow and I can just do it in person? Plus, there's no way in hell it can be messed up." Well, imagine my befuddlement when I got to the counseling office and the students working there told me I had to schedule an appointment online. I couldn't even do it through them right there. What kind of sh*t is that? If I can get something done in person, it should be done in person. And if not, it should be over the phone. Why are we trusting computers to do it when they are known to occasionally screw up and we can do it ourselves?
The main reason why I have this angle is because I don't want anything to go wrong. As a result, I've begun to hate texting in recent years. I mean, I'm not very popular to begin with, so most of the time, it's a superfluous option on my cell phone plan. The other problem is that meaning can be lost in text and it can take so much time to type a message And! I could be trying to get something else done at the time. I used to have whole conversations through text, but these days I try to avoid them because I don't have the patience and if I really need/want to talk to you, it's just easier to call. Pick up the phone!
5. No One Asks Me For Advice
This is one of those INTJ stereotypical behaviors that I had a real hard time coming up with by myself. But basically, the stereotype is that people are always coming to INTJs for advice. (And then usually the people don't follow that advice only to have it all blow up in their face.) I mean, I have had people ask for my advice, but it's not something I'm known for. No one calls me an advisor or seeks me out to hear what I think. Now, this could be because most of the people I know have their sh*t together and so they don't need advice, or it's because I don't offer advice. In fact, I don't give advice unless directly asked because unasked for advice is one of the most annoying things in the world and the last time someone really asked for my advice, I told her to do whatever she really wanted because I knew which way she wanted to go, I knew that that was the way she was going to go, and she wasn't really listening to what I was telling her anyway. So, if people aren't going to listen anyway, why bother telling them in first place?
Bonus: I Get Angry
That's right; I thought I would include a bonus way I buck the INTJ stereotype and that is that I do get angry. INTJs are known for being very cool and generally unaffected by stressful events. Supposedly we have a long, long fuse until our bombs go off. And this is true for me to an extent, but when something really pisses me off, like city councils helping to organize ANTIFA demonstrations and telling the police to stand down when things get violent, I can get hopping mad and I imagine punching in the faces of all the piss ants who've pissed me off. The chances of me actually exploding out in public are pretty slim, but that doesn't mean I'm not angry. Of the seven deadly sins, I struggle with gluttony, lust, avarice, and vanity, but the only one I really fear is wrath because it has such a hold on me. Sometimes I enjoy imagining all the violent scenarios that go through my head. And to some extent, I do worry what could happen if I ever got so angry, in public, that I would find myself in a colossal brawl because I'm sure it would not go as well as daydreams portray.
Okay, that's enough for now. For next week, I'm not sure what I'm going to do. I could do a bit on a theory I had about MBTI primary and secondary personalities. Yes, you read that right, personalities, not functions. In fact, screw all that function crap, it's too complicated. But basically the post would be about how while I am primarily an INTJ, I can become an ISTJ for the sake of survival. That's the theory. So, we'll see. Until next week...
Keep writing, my friends.
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