Let's talk about writing.
So, some of you are likely Grease fans, and you may be upset by this bold declaration. Don't get me wrong, though, I too appreciate the great American musical. Sometimes grease is the word. It's got groove, it's got meaning. And there are times when it is definitely the time, the place, and the motion. Some days, grease is the way I'm feeling. I also pine for those summer nights where I stay out until 10 o' clock and make out with a pretty girl under the dock. And sometimes, I feel like I was born to hand jive.
But, despite all these good emotions, Grease does have a major problem--not as a musical, but as a story. You see, in all modern stories, main characters go through a change, an arc, a journey. Call it what you want, but by the end of the story, they're no longer the same person they were at the start, and generally, it's for the better. And who am I kidding, we the audience love it when they change for the better. And that's the problem with Grease. Despite its ten main characters, only one of them goes through a real character arc, one of them tries and reverts, and the others stay the same, more or less. Let's take a look at them.
1. Sandy and Danny
Starting with Sandra Dee, this girl is the closest thing we get to having a protagonist. Now, some may argue that Danny is actually the protagonist, but the reason why I say Sandy is the protagonist is because she's the only one who changes, and not for the better I may add. Sandy starts out as your typical girl-next-door type. She's fairly milquetoast, but what's wrong with a good, clean-living girl? Especially for the '50's. Absolutely nothing except for the fact that she falls in love with Danny who is the leader of the T-Birds, a gang.
Some people may have a hard time understanding that, but it's true--greasers were '50's gangs. Instead of wearing saggy pants, they wore leather jackets. Instead of wearing beanies, they greased their hair. And instead of low-riders, they drove hot rods and motorcycles. But the thing that both generations have in common is gang violence. Gats might be more popular today, but that may only be because switchblades aren't as efficient as taking down a rival gang. So, yeah, greasers were gangsters. We don't really see the T-Birds that way because the most violent thing they do is have an illegal drag race through a drain, but the greasers from The Outsiders are closer to the truth.
Getting back to our story, plain Jane, good girl, Sandy falls in love with gang leader Danny Zuko. The main drama of the musical is taken up with Danny trying to find ways to reform himself into a model student so he can be the kind of guy Sandy would date. He tries to shed his greaser visage for a clean-cut, all-American boy. And by the end, he succeeds. He becomes a jock and cleans up his image, but then Sandy comes out looking like every greaser's wet dream. Danny then goes back on his hard work and becomes a greaser again.
The issue we have here is that Danny made the effort to change, even though such a change wasn't really necessary--remember, he was everything Sandy wanted back when they met at the beach--but then he didn't need his "redemption" as Sandy lowered herself to his level, which again, wasn't necessary as she was what he wanted back at the beach. So, while Sandy may be a round character, she changed the wrong way and went in the wrong direction, and Danny may have been a round character, but he didn't have to be by the musical's end. So, what was all his hard work for? And if they accepted each other when Danny didn't need to be the leader of the T-Birds, why didn't Danny just cut the sh*t and be who he was then?
2. Rizzo and Kenickie
Rizzo and Kenickie is another example of characterization blue-ballsing. The big thing that happens between them is that Rizzo misses her period and it's believed that Kenickie knocked her up. Kenickie, trying to be a good guy, tries to accept the responsibility of his actions, but Rizzo pushes him away. She eventually takes him back, but not until her pregnancy turns out to be a false alarm. At which point, they celebrate. How? Well, I already said they get back together, but presumably they banged again later. Hey, if they did it in a car when they weren't really going out, of course they're going to do when they're serious about each other.
Now, Rizzo does go through a change of sorts by accepting her feelings for Kenickie, but so what? She stops acting tough--but did she really learn anything? Did she learn not to screw guys outside of marriage? Did she learn how to avoid unwanted pregnancies and how to not let her passions control her? There are no indications that she did, and there are no indications that Kenickie learned anything either. A fan of the show may give them the benefit of the doubt, but one of the rules of cinema is, if they don't show it, you don't know for sure. I know Grease was originally a musical, but the same principle still applies. If no one says anything different and there aren't any scenes demonstrating that their characters went through a change, no one can say with any degree of certainty that they did, and therefore it must be presumed that they didn't.
3. Frenchy
Honestly, Frenchy is the only person in the musical who makes a change for the better. But! She only makes that change for the better after making a change for the worse, which is kind of funny because I'm sure many real-life beauticians sh*t all over Frenchy's story because of how their career choice is treated. True, beauticians don't make a lot of money, but some do all right for themselves depending on the salon and specific industry. Which then begs a question: was Frenchy really incompetent or was hair just not her thing? Or, maybe all she needed was more study. And, why couldn't she go to beauty school after high school?
So, again, with Frenchy we see a lot of strange choices and actions, and none of them are really mutually exclusive. I suppose you could say that because she made a good decision after making a bad one, she did learn her lesson and make a change for the better. But her choices really weren't so terrible, so her story's a wash.
4. And the Rest
And the rest... while I can remember names and faces, I'm not going to talk about it because honestly, the other members of the T-Birds and The Pink Ladies, they really don't have much of a story or add much to the story. Sure, they have wishes, dreams, and desires, but they don't change by the end. As far as I know, Sonny is still a loser, Marty is still looking for an easy out, and Jan is still a glutton. She also reminds me of my Aunt Maria, but that's a different story entirely.
So, yeah... I remember the first time I saw Grease all the way through. Hell, I went to see it back when I was a Youth Minister and some of my members were in their high school's version of it. Unfortunately, I don't remember a lot of it. I also don't remember a lot of Grease and the order of the scenes is jumbled as f*ck in my memory, which indicates that a good chunk of the story was forgettable and further proves that the story ain't that great.
So, the lesson here is, don't write a story like Grease. Have your main characters go through a few challenges and develop into slightly different characters by the end of the story. You know, like how real do.
In next week's Let's Talk About Writing, I'm going to go over and try a peachy, keen idea on how to create a story with Tarot cards. Don't miss it.
Keep writing, my friends.
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