The Top 7 Gift Ideas for INTJs: A Response to Psychology Junkie

Hey, everyone.

So, my birthday is Thursday, the 22nd. I'll be 29. I'm not telling you because I'm digging for birthday wishes, after all, why should you give a sh*t? (That's how I often feel about other people's birthdays.) I'm telling you because it coincides nicely with this week's INTJ post: the Top 7 Gift Ideas for INTJs. Originally, this was an article by Psychology Junkie, so as you can guess, this is another response post.

But, the original article by PJ is interesting. They didn't spout off a bunch of crap that they assumed they knew because they think they know what an INTJ is. They actually did research by asking INTJs what they thought about gifts, gift-getting, and gift-giving. The general consensus is that INTJs hate receiving gifts and prefer to give them. INTJs also don't make "Wish Lists" preferring to give into indulgence and just buy whatever they have a hankering for when they get said hankering. I guess this is another way I buck the INTJ stereotype because I love getting gifts and hate giving them. Sure, if I like the person, it's not a big deal and I hope they're pleased with what I give them, but I much prefer getting a gift than giving one. I'm unfortunately extremely materialistic, and I can always come up with a list of things I don't have and want when someone asks, but that just might be because I'm broke as f*ck.

Anyway, they also asked around 100 INTJs what sort of gifts they like, so this list is researched, however I would like to make a few tweaks and give each item a rating out of five in terms of how good I think it actually is. And before we get into this, here's my obligatory Patreon plug. Want to decide what I should write about or just believe in me? Show me the love on Patreon. Every single dollar keeps me from a mundane job. Alright, let's take a look at these.

1. Cash

There's a reason why they say "cash is king." It's mostly because credit doesn't actually exist, and checks have to be cashed or can bounce. But because cash is accepted everywhere in exchange for everything, it's the most practical gift you can give an INTJ. With cash, we can buy something we want or may need, and because cash can be used on anything, it's flexible and surrenders to the mad whims of whomever wields it! Ha ha! I can desire one thing when making my birthday or Christmas list a month before said day, but desire something completely different the day of. (It's actually happened before.) Hence, with cash an INTJ can always get what he really wants.

Rating: 5 out of 5 for flexibility.

2. Gift Cards

Ah, gift cards. They're a lot like cash in that they're extremely flexible, except they're only accepted at the store where you bought them. There might be prepaid credit cards now, but I don't think everyone accepts those. (Although, more and more places are accepting them everyday.) But I really shouldn't undermine the usefulness of gift cards just because they're slightly less flexible than cash. An INTJ might want Video Game A when he makes his list, but come the big day, he might want Video Game B instead. And having a Gamestop gift card, an INTJ can make that switch and no one be the wiser. And in terms of an iTunes gift card, instead of getting a CD which may only have 5 tracks out of 16 an INTJ likes, with the gift card, he can make sure he only gets the best of the best regardless of how many artists he buys from. So, gift cards, still pretty valid.

Rating: 4.5 out of 5 for being only slightly less flexible than cash.

3. Technological Gadgets

Hmm, technological gadgets. If you've been a reader of my blog for a while, you'll know that I buck the INTJ stereotype here as I don't give two sh*ts about gadgets. I mean, I have a PS4, a Nintendo Wii U, a laptop, a smartphone, and I've had many previous iPods, but the problem with those is that I don't consider them to be "gadgets." A "gadget" to me is something small and high-tech, but you really don't need it. With the way the modern world is, I need a laptop and smartphone, whereas gaming systems, I don't consider them gadgets because of the hours and hours of entertainment they provide, like a DVD player and TV. And you need to have fun.

Under my definition, the only thing that I can really call a gadget is my iPod. Unfortunately, I've been without a working iPod since about late spring, so I don't really "have" one. And I can't really think of anything else that I have that is gadget-y. I have a wireless mouse, but good luck finding a mouse these days with a wire, and I do have a calorie counter, but I need one for when I workout. And, I would also say a gadget is something that was made high-tech for the sake of being high-tech--it's an exercise in technological masturbation. Now, my PS4 might have gadget-y things about it like being able to connect to YouTube and Netflix, but it's a gaming console first.

Gadgets can be cool and unique, but unless they have some other day-to-day function, the novelty of a gadget wears off pretty damn fast. So, unless it's a watch that can tell me the time in every other time zone or a pen that writes with a laser, I would never suggest getting anyone a gadget. Unfortunately, gadgets made PJ's list at number 3, which means I must be in the minority of INTJs who feel this way.

Rating: 3 out of 5 because other INTJs like them.

4. Hand-Made Gifts

Now, this seems like a weird one. INTJs are cold and brainy. Why the hell would they be into hand-made stuff? Well, INTJs are kind of huge softies on the inside. (Shh! Don't tell them I told you that.) So, when someone puts a bunch of effort into something that's specifically made for us, we're extremely touched, especially because we're usually under the impression no one likes us and we assume we aren't on anybody's radar as we try to stay in the shadows as much as possible. To give someone something hand-made, it means you were thinking about them even when they're not around and you really like that person... even when they're such a pain in the ass.

However, before you rush off to Michaels to get some crafty crap and start making us something, I should tell you that we have restrictions on hand-made gifts. Like, we don't want your home-made macaroni art. We are not your mother. If you're going to give us something hand-made, practical stuff is best, like a scarf, a sweater, pair of gloves, or a blanket. My godmother once made me a quilt which I quite like. I told her I still had it, but I wished it was longer. She went and made me another one just 'cause.

Old quilt on top of the new, longer one.

Although, art pieces aren't necessarily completely off-limits. Just make sure they're good quality and have had some effort put into them, and it's something we want. My sister once gave me a chalk drawing of the Guardian Force Bahamut from Final Fantasy VIII. It's pretty cool. Unfortunately, I can't find it right now. But it's something arsty-fartsy that I wanted, and not a fusilli Bryan.

And what about hand-made gifts that you didn't make yourself but instead just bought, like a whip or a PVC bow? Well, those are still pretty cool. Not as cool as if you had done it yourself, but you still went through the trouble to buy something that takes a while to do, so it's still appreciated. (Just not as much if you had done it yourself.)

Rating: 4 (or higher) out of 5 for being so damn touching.

5. A Book About Their Interest

Ah, books. I love'em. Love'em! From where I'm sitting, I can see more than a dozen right in front of me. If I spin my chair around, I'll see a bookshelf and a half of books. And if I further spin my chair, I can see a storage unit under my bed full of books that I didn't want taking up room on my bookshelves. Yes, INTJs like books. There's no finer form of entertainment or knowledge gathering.

I know, that's a pretty big claim to make, but books are so rich with words and details that make a thousand different nuances and spins, and in terms of knowledge, they're just so damn practical. You've got an index and you can flip between pages quite easily. PDF files might have a "Search" option, but you can't always take a computer with you and not everyone owns a tablet, plus they're not much good in raw sunlight and they automatically dim if they're not constantly in use. Which means, if you're practicing HEMA and you're teaching yourself  guards, a tablet and computer fail where a propped up book excels. And books are just classy. So, books are practical, and both mentally and aesthetically pleasing. What fun. Not to mention, an INTJ's interest can also be in fiction or poetry, so prose isn't off the table either.

Rating: 4.5 out of 5 for being practical, entertaining, classy, and beating the hell out of technology most days.

6. Wine and Chocolate

Wine and chocolate? What's that? A young adult supernatural romance where the girl's the monster? Wait, no. That's Blood and Chocolate. Silly me. (But seriously, the movie was better.)

Anyway, I start this one off with a jest because it threw me for a loop. All the others make some sort of sense, but wine and chocolate seems to come out of left field. PJ explained this one as such:

"Feed your INTJs inferior Extraverted Sensing (Se) with a delicious gift of the food variety! Many INTJs said they enjoy getting wine, beer, or homemade whiskey as a gift. Others loved teas, coffees, and chocolates."

Oh, boy. Inferior Extraverted Sensing. I've said it before and I'll say it again: all that cognitive function crapola is... crapola. It never ceases to confuse the hell out of me. It all just feels more complicated than it needs to be. However, I have started to look into it in case it offers up any interesting insights. And here's one: Se is our last cognitive function, so how high up on the list of things we want can wine and chocolate be? Speaking of which...

Well, I do like tea and milk chocolate, and while I would appreciate a gift of the tea variety, I might feel slightly emasculated if someone actually gave me chocolate. Unless I was in Japan on Valentine's Day. (It's actually tradition for the girls to give guys chocolate. Although sometimes it's crappy "obligation" chocolate.) But anywhere else, I'd kind of be like, wait, what the f*ck?

As for coffee and booze, while I would appreciate good coffee or homemade liquor, I would never actually ask for either since I don't drink coffee as I don't want to get addicted to the caffeine and I don't drink spirits ever since I found out how bad it they are for the brain. But-but-but, the health benefits! Not worth it as every little bit of booze kills brain cells. Not to mention, all the health benefits that can be garnered from alcohol can be had in other, better, more efficient ways that don't kill brain cells. In the end, I can't plug chocolate, coffee, and booze as being good gift ideas. However, I would greatly appreciate cannoli, scones, paczki, cheesecake, homemade cookies, and I'm an absolute slut for brownies.

(Wine and Chocolate) Rating: 3 out of 5 because other INTJs like them.

(Tea, Baked Goods, and Other Desserts) Rating: 4 out of 5 because what monster doesn't like brownies?

7. Quality Office (or School) Supplies

This is another queer bird. I mean, I definitely appreciate a good pen and as a writer, I'm always going through notebooks, but I really wouldn't be down for being gifted with either.

Unless it was one of those tip and strip strippers pens.

The problem with office and school supplies is that these are things INTJs need, and if we really need them, we'll go out and buy them for ourselves. The only office supplies I can really think of that I would really want is like a leather briefcase or pimped out business cards. I could also make due with a superb dictionary and thesaurus, but it's not really something I'd ask for.

Rating: 3 (or less) out of 5 unless we're talking a leather briefcase.

Alternative Ideas

Alright, so because those last two are kind of stinkers, let me offer two alternative gift ideas. I know I'm not the stereotypical INTJ, so I might be the only one who feels this way about these things, but it's worth a shot.

8. Music

Dude, I f*cking love music. Well, I'm sure everyone does, but as we all know, INTJs aren't very good at expressing themselves outwardly despite the emotional chaos on the inside. And at times like those, sometimes our thoughts and feelings can only be expressed through a certain song or band. Take me for example, I feel like heavy metal just "gets" and describes me in a way very few things can. A funnier example is the way I feel about Kid Rock's "So Hott" because it tends to describe my feelings toward my "friend" Mary quite well.

"I don't wanna be your friend, I wanna f*ck ya like
I'm never gonna see ya again!"

But, music brah, it's a legitimate gift-giving strategy. Just make sure you ask what your INTJ likes. Our tastes in music are as eccentric as the rest of our interests.

9. Mystic Artifacts

People like to say INTJs aren't religious or spiritual. That's bullsh*t. If we weren't the slightest bit spiritual, we wouldn't be "otherworldly." That's how you acquire that trait. But that's a rant for another time. The point here is that INTJs do have mystic and occult interests. I know finding a legit artifact can be difficult, and you should always use caution around items that may be cursed or contaminated by evil, but if you know an INTJ with an interest in Tarot, runes, crystals, incense, or prefers a more wholesome rosary or crucifix, these are all legitimate gift ideas as they help an INTJ solve the deeper mysteries of the universe as we reach out to touch the ethereal plane.

10. (Bonus!) Yourself

It might sound trite, but it's true. Just like how we're touched by the sentiment of hand-made gifts, the gift of you is the greatest thing you can give us. We're big softies on the inside and we know we can be a pain in the ass, so spending some quality time can mean the world to us. I've been out with friends and let them do most of the talking as well as choose the activity, but I still enjoy myself because I'm with someone I like. I also read somewhere that the love language of INTJs is quality time, and we wouldn't have that as our love language if we weren't terribly fond of you.

Conclusion

In the end, except for three of these: office supplies, wine and chocolate, and gadgets, they're all good gift ideas. However, you really don't need a gift ideas list for an INTJ; all you need to do is ask us what we want and we'll tell you. We appreciate the direct method, and honestly, wouldn't it make you happier knowing that you got us something we actually want rather than guessing and getting it wrong? I wouldn't try the surprise method unless you know your INTJ really well.

Well, that's it for this week. For next week, I'm going to try to write my theory on why ENFPs and INTJs seem to be destined for each other. I think I have enough research and resources to back my claims. But we'll see. Until then...

Keep writing, my friends.

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Would an INTJ Say These 10 Things You Shouldn't Say to an ENFP?: A Response to Psychology Junkie

Hey, everyone.

So, if you're an INTJ or an ENFP, or you spend a lot of time in the world of MBTI, you're likely aware that INTJs and ENFPs are supposed to be destined for each other. INTJs give ENFPs the structure they need to mature, and ENFPs give INTJs an outlet for their more relaxed side. But is this relationship truly a match made in heaven?

Whilst trolling through Pinterest, I found an article on Psychology Junkie titled "10 Things You Should Never Say to an ENFP," and I had two major thoughts while reading this list: 1. Many of these shouldn't be said to an INTJ, either, and 2. An INTJ would totally say these things to someone else.

INTJs are well-known for being contradictory, so this contradiction shouldn't come as a surprise to many. So, after having that second thought, I began to wonder if INTJs and ENFPs are really soul mates. Let's look through this list and I'll tell you which of these ten items an INTJ would say to an ENFP, and why they can say these without feeling like hypocrites.

1. Because that's how it's always been done.

This statement rubs both personalities the wrong way, but for different reasons: INTJs dislike forced tradition, especially when no one has even considered a better method, and ENFPs just dislike the tired, tried-and-true method. But, an INTJ would totally say this to an ENFP.

The INTJ is a creature of habit and resists change as much as possible. The problem with "change" is that there's no guarantee it will be better than what exists now, and sometimes change doesn't work which is inefficient, not to mention the inefficiency in trying to integrate the change. Most things in an INTJ's world must be just so, so when an ENFP starts asking questions and asking why things can't be different, the INTJ may just throw this statement down and not bother to give an explanation because if the ENFP can just leave it at that, it would be more convenient for everybody involved and that fits the INTJ like a speedo.

2. Be more realistic.

Another one that would grind the gears of both personalities. Both would rather focus on what could be rather than what is; both types are dreamers and visionaries. But INTJs can be extremely pragmatic when necessary, and if there should come a time when dealing with an ENFP who just can't seem to face the facts and accept things as they are, the INTJ will get annoyed and slap this on her, hoping it'll stop her from being a pain in the ass. (That's right; I assume the INTJ is a masculine personality and ENFP is a feminine one. Come at me, bro.)

3. Because I said so.

"And just who the hell are you? What's your authority? Where does it come from? Was it earned, or are in the family business?"

This statement doesn't cut much mustard with either personality because unless a person has passed their rigorous tests and met their exceedingly high standards, then a person's right to authority is up for debate.

However, INTJs would totally say this to ENFPs. INTJs are stubborn, and generally, the only authority they trust is their own. And since they don't like explaining themselves or because other people don't need to have the "plan" explained to them, INTJs would expect this line to be the only qualifier ENFPs need to fall in line. And it certainly doesn't help that many of the things an INTJ says end up coming to pass, so if an ENFP doesn't heed the INTJ's word, she'll have to deal with a mild, but very smug, form of gloating for the rest of her life. And with that sort of accuracy, an INTJ's word usually becomes prophecy.

4. You can't do that.

"Hold my beer and watch this."

That's what both personalities would say, especially if what they're trying to do is something they really want or is something where other people's disbelief is incredibly strong. Both INTJs and ENFPs like making the impossible possible. But, once again, an INTJ would say this to an ENFP. Chances are good he's already thought the situation through from every angle and weighed the possibility of every outcome. While somewhere deep down, the INTJ might believe "everything is possible," but to make conversation more convenient, he'll just say this instead of trying to explain to the ENFP why it would be better not to try. And again, that's that "INTJ Authority." It's been well tested and proven.

5. You have no idea.

Oh, boy... As Intuitives, we've had a lot of ideas, and if someone just stopped for a second and tried to explain it to us, we'd bet you 20 bucks, we could grasp the idea. We're open-minded enough to do it. But when it comes to Intuitives interacting and sharing their thoughts and ideas with each other, there's a lot to process. And the place where those thoughts and ideas originate are so large, so marvelous, both the INTJ and ENFP have a hard time understanding their own heads. So, it's just easier and more convenient to say "You have no idea" rather than taking the time and effort to delve into those deep recesses and explain it.

6. You're such a flirt.

Now, this one is bit different. INTJs won't say this per se, but they may say something to the effect of it. I can't see most INTJs using the word "flirt" as a noun, only as a verb. They're more likely to say "tease," or if they're foul-mouthed, which most of them are, "cocktease" even if there are no c*cks in play. "Vamp" and "coquette" are also fair game.

Now, according to Psychology Junkie, this statement irritates ENFPs because they hate having their motivations questioned when they're just trying to be friendly. I guess the assumption is supposed to be that most people assume ENFPs have ulterior motives for their playful behaviors. But, if an INTJ arrived at this conclusion, he isn't likely to say anything to the ENFP. He'll just conclude his business and be on his way, most likely thinking her to be mighty strange.

7. Here's your project. The deadline is tomorrow.

An INTJ is only likely to say this to an ENFP if they're working together and the INTJ is the boss. In a working environment, this statement is totally free game, but in a personal relationship, no. However, there is something like this that an INTJ might say. Looking at #8...

8. Stop brainstorming and just decide.

An INTJ would definitely say this to an ENFP. Well, not that "brainstorming" part. I don't know about the rest of you, but I think of "brainstorming" as a part of the creative process; it's something you do in the "pre-production" stages of a project. But, an INTJ would definitely push an ENFP to make a decision about an important life event if he felt she was dragging her feet. True, an INTJ might be just as indecisive, but most of the time, when an INTJ makes up his mind, he secures the course. ENFPs are the kind of people that know they have a reputation for flightiness so they try to minimize the effect of that reputation as much as possible. As a result, they want to consider a decision from every angle to make sure they don't get buyer's remorse.

So, while both types have this issue, once a decision is made, they handle their decision in very different ways. Because INTJs are stubborn bastards and stay along a path they don't necessarily like for a while, they think this balances out the time they took to make the decision. But because ENFPs don't have this quality, INTJs aren't likely to put up with them taking a long time to decide something.

9. You're perfectly normal.

This is definitely something you don't want to say to an INTJ. We abhor normal. I mean, on the one hand, it does give a convenient framework from which we can launch our own research, but we are by no means normal. Why? Because we are imaginative, visionary, and think outside the box. And guess what? So are ENFPs. Basically anyone who is an Intuitive doesn't like being called "normal." Sensing types are normal, we're not. But, would an INTJ say this to an ENFP?

Yes. See, it's one thing to be imaginative and visionary, but when you factor in how other people see you and whether or not you're generally accepted by the public, this is where the disparity between the two types comes in to play. While most people demonstrate acceptance of INTJs on the surface, that is, as long as we do what we're supposed to and there are no surprises, everything's okie-dokie, artichokie. But, if most people knew what INTJs were like in private, they wouldn't be very accepting of us, and the problem with that is that who we are in private is who we actually are. Who we are in public is artifice. And I can already hear the ENFPs screaming that they're the same way, but from the perspective of an INTJ, you're really not.

Because you're Feeling types and Extraverted, you can connect with people in so effortless a way, it looks like a kind of well-practiced artifice; it's almost sorcery or witchcraft. Because of this uncanny ability, despite the fact that you might have big, imaginative, and visionary ideas, you'll always be able to find someone who's willing to listen to you and to give you a platform to be heard. People may not understand you or your ideas, but because you're able to connect with them in other ways, they'll accept you as one of their own, albeit, just think you're a little strange. This is not the case with INTJs. Therefore, although you may not be normal, INTJs will always consider you to be "normal."

10. If you really cared about me, you'd...

Oh, so you want to stress test my feelings for you? Well...

See, just saying this to an INTJ puts us in a rebellious, ready-for-a-fight type of attitude. You want to put conditions on us and our feelings because you don't understand how we operate or just because we don't operate within your ideals of love. Now, let's be fair, if you do care about someone, you won't be an assh*le to them. And if you are, you'll feel badly about it later. My mother has used lines like this on me to get me to wash the dishes. It didn't work, not because I don't love my mother, but rather because I knew she wasn't serious. And, if she had pushed this angle a little, I probably would've caved and washed the dishes. Anyway, would an INTJ say this to an ENFP?

In a healthy relationship, no. Maybe only as a joke or as some gentle prodding to get her to do anal, but other than that, no. In an unhealthy relationship, however, where the INTJ is manipulative or the ENFP is immature, yes, it would come up. It might also come up in a relationship where the INTJ doesn't have a lot of experience dating and the ENFP does. This would be a problem because the ENFP doesn't know how to show love for the INTJ because he himself doesn't really know what he wants or likes. But, the line "If you loved me, you would..." is more of the start to a philosophical conversation about how love is demonstrated rather than as a means to box the ENFP in to doing something she doesn't want to. It's an INTJ trying to straighten things out and make sense of the whole relationship-thing. It's not manipulation, it's reasoning.

Conclusion

So, are INTJs and ENFPs really a match made in heaven, or is that just hypothetic rhetoric? Well, it's difficult to say. Although an INTJ may say a lot of these things to an ENFP, even his ENFP, it's not because he's not understanding of her. They would be used as shortcuts for when he doesn't want to explain himself or for those times when he's just tired of the ENFP. And, I can already hear it, the voices of hundreds of irritated ENFP girlfriends saying things like, "Please, explain yourself! We'll listen! It doesn't matter how long it takes!" and "Please, don't say that to us. It stings to the core."

So, let this be a lesson, to us both. For us INTJs, don't be too quick to bust these out on your ENFP as she's more like you than you think (you know, treat her the way you want to be treated), and for ENFPs, don't get upset if your INTJ says these things. Just genuinely explain yourself to him that it hurts when he does, and he'll be more than happy to adjust. That is, if he loves you. If he's just an assh*le, don't expect it, but this would be the perfect time to litmus test that.

Anyway, that's it for now. I'll see you guys next week where I'll be doing a response to POPSUGAR on 13 spot-on signs that someone is an INTJ. And fear not, I am preparing some original articles. I don't know when they'll be out, but expect the first ghost when the bell tolls one.

Keep writing, my friends.

More About Bryan C. Laesch:

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10 Things You Should Never Say to an INTJ: A Response to Psychology Junkie

Hey, everyone.

So, yeah, I've had the devil's time of getting back into writing. Part of the problem is I got a video game or two that I don't need to connect to the Internet in order to enjoy, so I've been playing the crap out of those. So, I'm going to try to get a couple of response posts out to make up for the lack of production, and in this one, we're looking at 10 things you should never say to an INTJ as speculated by Psychology Junkie here. Are they right, or will this be another list of ways I buck the stereotype? Let's get into it.

1. You Don’t Know What You’re Talking About

While it's possible I don't know what I'm talking about, if I decide to join a conversation, then that most likely means I have something to contribute, which means there's at least an 80% chance that I know something about the topic. True, a person won't necessarily know that my contributions are rare, but if you know a person is an INTJ, you really shouldn't say this to him as he will definitely take it as an insult.

2. You Think Too Much

Maybe you don't think enough, you ever think of that?! Huh? Huh?!

But seriously, INTJs might be over-thinkers. A friend of mine once compared me to Hamlet because I had a tendency to think so much about my problems that I would think them dead, to the point where action was no longer a choice, or I would convince myself into not taking action. So, learning to think less could be good for INTJs. But! I am forced to ask: have you ever looked at the world and wondered why it's so f*cked up? There are a few reasons for this, but one of them is that very few people think about what they're doing. So, how about this? I'll promise to think less if you retards promise to think more. Deal?

3. You Need to Lighten Up!

INTJs don't lighten up, at least, not out in public. At home, we can be very light, absurd, and downright ridiculous if the mood strikes. But, if someone tells us this while we're out, we're going to darken even further. This statement comes across as criticism, so we're likely to take it negatively, and we don't like it when other people try to tell us our business or take undeserved authority above us.

4. You Can’t Do That

Hold my beer and watch this.

5. You Should Smile More

Again, just like with thinking too much, maybe you smile too much, and just like with lightening up, we're more likely to frown harder and heavier when told this. What makes you such an expert on the ways of life that you know for a fact smiling would improve my life somehow?

But seriously, when it comes to smiling, I really hate it when people are disingenuous or seem to be wastefully cheerful. As a result, I don't want to cheapen my smile or my happiness by smiling when I don't actually feel like it. I want all my smiles to be genuine. So, if I'm scowling and you don't like it, give me a reason to smile. Or f*ck off. Either or.

6. Because This is How It’s Always Been Done

Well, maybe there's a better way or maybe it's time things change.

This isn't always the case, some things should never change, but there is a lot that can. Where technology is concerned, there's almost certainly a better way of doing things if you're willing to experiment a little.

On a more personal note, I used to wear a hat all the time, including indoors. Why? Because I like hats. But my parents would always try to get me to take it off. I finally asked why one day, and my Old Man said that by wearing a hat indoors, I'm insinuating to my host that I'm in a rush to leave. Personally, I don't think this argument holds any water, especially not among family and friends. I thought of a better reason later which was that a hat shelters your head while outside, but when inside, you have a roof for shelter and to keep wearing your hat indoors can be an insult to your host because it's like you're saying, "I don't trust your roof to keep me sheltered, so I'm going to rely on my own."

But, way back when, I mostly wore my hat indoors because it was a part of my look and I liked it. So, when people told me to take it off, I refused, and it was partially because I wanted to be contrary to show that an old-fashioned tradition doesn't mean sh*t these days. So, don't say this to INTJs unless you can give a good argument as to why a procedure or tradition has never changed.

7. You Need to Go Out More

Maybe you go out too much! You ever think of that, huh?!

No, but seriously; there's not much out in the world that we want to see and experience for ourselves. My mother knew someone who went to Machu Picchu, and when she asked him how it was, he said it was exactly like it was on TV. I took that to mean that there are some things out there that are not any better in person than they are in a photograph. Plus, going out more means that we would have to deal with people more and we aren't people persons. And since we're not very social to begin with, and we're unintentionally weird, we are likely to "go out" without any sense or idea of what to do after. Without some better direction, we're not going to know what to do with "out" when we find it.

So, if you want to tell us to go out, make sure you give us a good reason why and list a few places we can go that might be of interest to us.

8. I Just Decided to Pop Over!

Yeah, don't do this. Even if you're friends with the INTJ. For starters, it's just plain rude because we might be busy, and secondly, INTJs abhor disturbances and distractions. And with how weird we can be, you might walk in on something really strange and we won't want to explain ourselves because that'll be more embarrassing than what you caught us doing. Just, just don't do it.

9. Here, Let Me Show You How It’s Done

Well, we're not insane, so if it's something that we genuinely don't know how to do, it's fine. But when I say "fine," I mean the womanly "fine"--the lying "fine." Everything will eventually be truly fine, but to avoid all tension and problems, what you should do is tell us how to do it, just don't do so condescendingly. Also, we're smart enough to make the necessary jumps in logic to the next steps, so don't be surprised if we're a faster study/learner than the people you usually explain things to.

10. That’ll Never Happen

I could go into a big thing about how INTJs love possibility and we're romantic enough to be like, "Never say never" or some crap, but I'm going to keep this short and leave you with this:

Conclusion

In conclusion, Psychology Junkie is more or less right. These are 10 things you should never say to an INTJ, although #8 is more of something you shouldn't do to an INTJ. I mean, when I say "should," I don't mean we're going to rip your arms out of your sockets for saying these things to us, but we will be upset, and in some cases, we'll damn near kill ourselves just to prove you wrong, which could actually result in something cool or wonderful happening, but it's probably not a good idea.

Anyway, that's it for now. I'll see you guys on the flip side.

Keep writing, my friends.

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